cleaned out my closet

Technically, i've cleaned out my closet. I've cleaned my room, which is unbelievable. It's not really something i like doing. It's also something i rarely do, for example, when my mom threatens me of restraint from going out, that's when i clean it. But cleaning my room helped me. It helped me think of what i should do and of who i should be. I should be me. DUH, but even if it is a big duh, a lot of people still have a hard time of being themselves. It's weird, that sometimes, the hardest thing to do is be ourselves. Why is that so? Maybe we think to much of what other people think of us. It's about all those so called "reputation" that we have to live up to. Why do we fall into the trap of having to be someone else but us? What's wrong with being who we are?

Of course it is important that others think of who we are as good reputable people. But that's not what living life is. Of course we have to stay decent, but it's also important to be ourselves. It's not good to pretend.

After cleaning out my closet, I decided to replace and to throw away a few things. It may have been hard, but things have to change and change has to be accepted or denied. I accepted mine. I threw out my being unreasonable, especially when it comes to things i want. I threw out the part of me who's hard headed. I threw out the irresponsible part of me as well. I threw out the part of me who has been hiding, no more hiding, i want to be me. No more trying to be who i'm not. I'm done with that.

I will change and continue this change. I have to be more mature and i can't stay a small fragile child anymore. I'm growing up. I'm going to grow up with the people i love most. I'm going to make them feel proud of me. And all those who look down at me, will be sorry. I know i'm just saying this right now, and words are nothing compared to actions. But i promise, to the people i love, to God, and most importantly, myself, that i will be a better person. I will fulfill these things that i have said. And i will also learn to save more from now on. I will also work out more in gym and have a good and healthy diet so i can become slim and more fit. I'm going to live my life with no regret anymore. I'm going to live my life to the fullest.

~living life in love <3 -Talia-~